Suffering a Loss
Dearest Jesus, who wept at the death of your friend
And taught that they who mourn shall be comforted,
Grant us the comfort of your presence in our loss.
Send Your Holy Spirit to direct us
Lest we make hasty or foolish decisions.
Send Your Spirit to give us courage
Lest through fear we recoil from living
Send Your Spirit to bring us your peace
Lest bitterness, false guilt, or regret take root in our hearts.
The Lord has given.
The Lord has taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.
Amen.
The Blessed Virgin’s Intercession
O sweet mother Mary,
Who knew the sadness of mourning those your heart loved most,
Jesus, your Son,
And Joseph, your devoted spouse. Pray for us in our time of loss.
Amen
Additional Blessed Virgin’s Intercession
O sweet mother Mary,
Like us you experienced the sadness of mourning those closest to your heart,
Your beloved Son Jesus,
Your devoted spouse, St. Joseph
And your mother and father Saints Ann and Joachim.
Pray for us in our time of loss.
Amen
For those who lost a baby through miscarriage
Why, my Lord—dare I ask why? It will not hear the whisper of the wind or see the beauty of its parents’ face—it will not see the beauty of Your creation or the flame of a sunrise. Why, my Lord?
“Why, My child—do you ask ‘why’? Well, I will tell you why.
You see, the child lives. Instead of the wind he hears the sound of angels singing before My throne. Instead of the beauty that passes he sees everlasting Beauty—he sees My face. He was created and lived a short time so the image of his parents imprinted on his face may stand before Me as their personal intercessor. He knows secrets of heaven unknown to men on earth. He laughs with a special joy that only the innocent possess. My ways are not the ways of man. I create for My Kingdom and each creature fills a place in that Kingdom that could not be filled by another. He was created for My joy and his parents’ merits. He has never seen pain or sin. He has never felt hunger or pain. I breathed a soul into a seed, made it grow and called it forth.”
I am humbled before you, my Lord, for questioning Your wisdom, goodness, and love. I speak as a fool—forgive me. I acknowledge Your sovereign rights over life and death. I thank You for the life that began for so short a time to enjoy so long an Eternity. Amen.
Miscarriage
Dearest Mother Mary, who knew the joy of holding Baby Jesus, please help me in this time of sadness and distress. Send your Infant to hug and console me and my loved ones. Intercede for us, asking God to grant us the understanding and knowledge of our little one’s great joy and happiness in heaven. We know that we will one day be reunited with our blessed baby and we also know he/she is happily with our deceased family members. We miss our baby desperately. Like us he/ she is a member of the communion of saints and angels. Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Now our child is adoring and rejoicing with Our Lord and Savior, and praying for our peace and tranquility awaiting the day we join him/her in heaven.
Mary, Mother of God, we place our hopes, fears and sadness in your hands. Pray for us now and always.
Amen
Pray in time of Sorrow
God of all consolation,
in your unending love and mercy for us,
you turn the darkness of death into the dawn of new life.
Show compassion to your people in sorrow.
Be our refuge and our strength to lift us
from the darkness of this grief
to peace and joy in your presence.
We ask this through Christ, our Lord.
Amen
In Time of Grief
O come, Thou Key of David, come,
And open wide our heavenly home;
Make safe the way that leads on high,
And close the path to misery.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.
Prayer written by Fr, Robert Fox – to Give Comfort
God of life and death, You have taken a beloved one from me. My heart is very heavy. I recall that Your Son, Jesus Christ, became man in all things except sin and that He groaned in sorrow at the death of His friend, Lazarus. I unite my grief with Yours dear Jesus, as You stood at the tomb of Lazarus.
O Virgin Mother, you know what it was like losing your husband Joseph, and then your child, dying suspended between earth and heaven, with a sword piercing your sweet soul. To you do I come in sorrow, begging strength from your intercession, from you who fully understand what it is like to lose one so dear and close.
Share with me, dear Mother of God, the courage, the strong faith that you had in the future resurrection. Even after Jesus came back to life and ascended into heaven, you knew you were to be left alone for many years before your own assumption into heaven. You comforted the Apostles as their Queen and Mother during those years. Grant comfort to me now as I sorrow in pain at the loss by the separation that has come as a result of the sin of our first parents and my own sins. Wipe away my tears with the merciful love of your Immaculate Heart as you unite me with my loved one through the grace of the Sacred Heart of your Son Jesus Christ.
Amen.
Prayer After the Death of a Child
My life is upside down, loving God. The order of the world is out of place and I can’t do anything to right it again. Oh, Lord, you know the pain in my heart at all times and you know why: my child has died. How can it be that my beloved child is gone? The child I cared for with such concern in every illness, the one I held close to my heart and promised to take care of for a lifetime, is not here for me to care for anymore. It hurts deeply that I wasn’t able to protect this child I love with my whole being from a death that seems so unfair.
Let me feel calm. Let me breathe deeply. Be with me in this kind of deep and transformative pain. I now carry this darkness with me on my back and in my heart, always. It is my burden and my companion.
Lord, there is not a single minute of my life when this loss is not etched so keenly into my brain and heart, whether it is in the middle of a busy day or in those choking moments of grief in the solitary dark of night. Let me be grateful for every minute we had together. Let me treasure those memories and find joy in them.
Help me to deal with people better. They don’t know what to say. They stumble and look away when they see me. They pretend nothing has happened. I know they “don’t want to remind me” but they don’t understand it is with me always, always.
Teach me, Lord. Tell me what you want me to do with this. What am I supposed to learn from this kind of pain? What are you calling me to do?
Open my battered heart and lead me to comfort and peace. Only you can give me the peace I need. Let me feel your presence in my life.
Amen
For a Mother who has died
Dear Lord, relying on your promises to us, I turn to you in trust that my mother is with you and that she is enjoying your loving embrace. You alone know how she loved the best she could and how she faithfully endured the struggles that she faced. You know the graces you gave her and you know the grace she was for me and for so many. For all the ways she truly loved the way you loved her, please reward her, Lord. May she enjoy the communion of all her family and friends who are with you.
Lord, I know my mother still loves us who are still here on earth. I ask you that you might listen to her fervent prayers for us. Help me to grow into a new and deeper relationship with my mother now, as I long for the day when we will both meet in your embrace – freed from all that might have hindered our relationship on earth, knowing and understanding everything we did not know or understand on this earth.
I ask you this with faith in the resurrection, trusting my mother’s love, and desiring that she knows my love for her.
Amen.
Gratitude for my Mother
Dear Lord, today I turn to you to give you thanks for my mother. With your own gift of life, she bore me in her womb and gave me life. She tenderly, patiently cared for me and taught me to walk and talk. She read to me and made me laugh. No one delighted in my successes more; no one could comfort me better in my failures. I am so grateful for how she mothered me and mentored me, and even disciplined me. Thank you Dear Lord for the gift of Mom.
Please inspire me to follow her in faith. Count her among the saints in heaven and give me the understanding and wisdom to know that she is in heaven praying for me still. Let me rejoice in her victory over sin and death and comfort me in my time of mourning.
Glory be to the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning is now and every shall be world without end, Amen.
For a Father who has died
Father of Life, I thank you for my father. He was such a blessing to me while he was still with us. I still miss him so much. I thank you for what he left me as gifts of love and faith. I pray that he has enjoyed your embrace and that the relationship he and I have now might someday be renewed with you in heaven. Until then, I entrust him to your love and ask you to let him look out for me and to assist me to stay on the path to you. Amen.
In Gratitude for my Husband
Dear God, I thank you for my husband. I thank you for letting this man come into and complete my life. I delighted in making him happy and caring for him. I am so grateful for how he loved me and cared for me. You know that there are days that we got on each other’s nerves, but I’m so grateful that he was my husband.
Please inspire me to follower him in faith. Count him among the saints in heaven and give me the understanding and wisdom to know that he is in heaven praying for me still. Let me rejoice in his victory over sin and death and comfort me in my time of mourning.
Glory be to the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning is now and every shall be world without end, Amen.
Prayers for the Deceased for Forgiveness and Peace and for Mourners
Lord Jesus, our Redeemer, You willingly gave Yourself up to death so that all people might be saved and pass from death into a new life. Listen to our prayers; look with love on Your people who mourn and pray for their dead brother/sister.
Lord Jesus, You alone are holy and compassionate; forgive our brother/sister his/her sins.
By dying You opened the gates of life for those who believe in You; do not let Your brother/sister be parted from You, but by Your glorious power give him/her light, joy, and peace in heaven where You live for ever and ever.
Amen.
Another Prayer
My brother (sister) in faith, I entrust you to God Who created you.
May you return to the One Who formed you from the dust of this earth.
May Mary, the angels, and all the saints come to meet you as you go forth from this life.
May Christ Who was crucified for you bring you freedom and peace.
May Christ, the Son of God, Who died for you take you into His kingdom.
May Christ, the Good Shepherd, give you a place within His flock.
May He forgive your sins and keep you among His people.
May you see your Redeemer face to face and enjoy the sight of God forever.
Amen.
Prayer After Death of Loved One
Saints of God, come to his/her aid! Come to meet him/her, angels of the Lord!
Response. Receive his/her soul and present him/her to God the Most High.
May Christ, Who called you, take you to Himself; may angels lead you to Abraham’s side.
Response: Receive his/her soul and present him/her to God the Most High.
Give him/her eternal rest, O Lord, and may Your light shine upon him/her forever.
Response: Receive his/her soul and present him/her to God the Most High.
Let us pray: We commend our brother (sister) N. to you, Lord.
Now that he/she has passed from this life, may he/she live on in Your presence.
In Your mercy and love, forgive whatever sins he/she may have committed through human weakness. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
Response: Amen.
Scripture Reflection
“Take courage, it is I. Do not be afraid,” Matthew 14:27
Take courage. You are inviting us to take on your courage. We don’t understand what has happened. We have no words. We know only that we turn to you and ask for courage and you offer it.
It is I. I am with you always. Yes. We take a deep breath and feel your presence. You are with each of us right now and with us as a community of faith. It doesn’t help us to understand but it helps us to calm our breathing.
Do not be afraid. Dear Jesus, right now it feels like that is all we have to cling to! The panic may return our bewilderment and uncertainty. But yet, your invitation is clear: Do not be afraid. That is for me, for all of us.
Dear Jesus, who understood fear and confusion so well, bless us in our great hour of loss and need. Be with us as we gather to weep and mourn at your altar. We beg you for the courage to delve into the silence, the wisdom to speak at the right time, and the fidelity to remember that you are with us in this great hour of need.
Amen.